If you can't calm the storm...calm yourself and watch the storm pass.

Most of us have been taught to react to life instead of truly responding to it. We’ve learned to believe that we’re in control; always trying to “manage” or “do” life, instead of being in relationship with it. All that reacting, resisting, and controlling keeps us trapped in our heads, disconnected from the deeper flow of life that’s always here, waiting for us to trust it...waiting for us to relax during the storms of life and watch them pass.

Over time, with inspiration from a few dear friends, I’ve found a few simple statements that help me return to presence; especially when life feels challenging or uncertain. They help me soften the grip of the reactive mind and reconnect with curiosity, spaciousness, a sense of wonder and even kindness. These phrases remind me that we are not victims of life:

1) It is what it is (Thank you, Sylvie F.)

2) Have faith...trust that this too shall pass (Thank you, Lisa...and Jesus)

3) Lean in...(Thanks, whomever started this popular phrase)

The first; It is what it is; I reminds me that I can't be in control of everything and shifts me out of reactivity. Because no matter how much I want things to be different, often things don't go the way I hoped. This shift in thinking helps me get back into a more conscious, open way of seeing...(which, p.s. is step one in strengthening our mental resiliency)

The second; Have faith...and trust. We already trust life more than we realize; we trust the body to breathe without having to tell it to do so, to digest our food and turn it into nutrients to fuel our bodies, to bring a new sunrise each day. But somewhere along the way, many of us have forgotten how to trust the unfolding of our own experiences; to lean into the challenging bits, the joys and the sorrows alike. L.R. Knost expresses this beautifully:

“Life is amazing. And then it's awful. And then it's amazing again. And in between the amazing and awful it's ordinary and mundane and routine. Breathe in the amazing, hold on through the awful, and relax and exhale during the ordinary. That's just living a heartbreaking, soul-healing, amazing, awful, ordinary life. And it's breathtakingly beautiful...”L.R. Knost

The second statement also reminds us that everything changes; from the cells in your body, to an overcast day....even the hardest moments....this too shall pass. Every sensation, every feeling, every thought is just a wave moving through.

The third, "Lean in," invites us to stop pushing against life and, instead, stay open. Yoga is the physical practice of staying open and leaning and breathing through discomfort and, as I like to say, "pratice in the body, often the mind will follow."

These phrases help me remember: this, too (whatever is challenging in my life situation), is my teacher. When I can meet it with awareness instead of resistance, something softens. I shift from suffering to curiosity, from control to connection.

It’s not always easy to respond instead of react. We all get caught; again and again. But that’s okay. Each time you remember, you can return. Silently repeat one of these phrases, or all three, and let them bring you back to this moment.